Ain't No Girl Love 'round Here Anymore

Grey's Anatomy, I have a bone to pick with you.

You have couples on your show that run the gauntlet.
We have couples that form when an underling sleeps with her boss. (Never a guy who sleeps with his boss. Notice that?) We have couples that for strictly for sex. We have couples that seem to be happily married, only to break up shortly after the birth of their child. We have couples that have been together for decades who break up then reunite. We have couples that cheat. Oh, gods, do we have couples that cheat. Let's see...we have a married man who knowingly sleeps with his underling, without telling her he's married, then wonders why she gets so upset when his wife shows up. We have couples that break up on their wedding day. We have couples that get married in a rush, only to have the husband freak out and start sleeping with his best friend because -- why again? I never really got that part. Does anyone on this show know the meaning of fidelity? (Wait -- Christina does. As does Bailey. So, two out of...how big's the cast again? And hey, they're both minority women. . .)

So, anyway. You have all these kinds of couples (and I'm sure I missed some somewhere), but you can't handle a same sex couple?

Seriously?

This season, the only thing that had me watching was the unfolding hook-up of Callie and Erica. I thought it was sweet. The build up to the first kiss last season? I liked it. Sure, as a queer girl, I was a little bemused by Callie's freak-out at discovering she had feeling for Erica. Hey, it IS confusing if you've never been attracted to another woman before to suddenly find yourself smitten. It was cute and not overdone and she and Erica dealt with it easily enough. And the leaked previews for this season had that relationship front and center. Good deal, I thought.

And then, what did you do? Oh, you did what every damned show does -- you fucked up. Big time.

First, Callie. Callie, one of the few people on the show who got fidelity. (Oh, look. ANOTHER minority woman. Are we sensing a pattern here boys and girls?) She hooks up with Erica, gets a little freaked out by Erica's "You're a leaf' speech and runs back to Mark for a little sex. (Although, Erica's leaf bit? Awesome. Likewise her, "I'm so totally gay" line. Very nice.) Callie. Who has just recovered from the devastation of her husband's cheating. Becomes a cheater. Uh-huh. At least Mark had the sense to tell her that she was cheating. (Mark Sloan: Grey's Anatomy Man Whore and Voice of Reason.) And you did get her to come clean pretty quickly. But still. Callie, cheating?

Then, Erica. She seemed to handle Callie's revelation of her on-call room fling with a bit of grace. Seemed to, being the operative word. They patched things up, Callie declared her desire to be with Erica and off we go. OK. Rocky start, but I'll go with it. These things happen. Then, Erica finds out about Izzy's whole 'stealing a heart for Denny' schtick. And that the hospital knew about it, including Callie, and didn't fire her. So, she goes off. An understandable reaction, given the circumstances. I'm all there for the righteous anger. BUT -- when Callie tries to talk her out of reporting the hospital, thereby endangering it's transplant statue and thereby risking the lives of countless patients -- she turns on her.

"You can't be a part-time lesbian," she says.

Hell, yes you can, says I -- and every other bisexual woman in the world. Oh, and so did Callie. Yay for Callie. But clearly, Erica is not over the whole 'I slept with Sloan, but I want you.' episode. (And really, can you blame her? You wake up with your girlfriend, tell her she's your Leaf, she runs away to work, knocks boots with the resident Man Whore and then tells you about it? All in, it seems, ONE DAY? I'd be pissed too.)

So, then what happens?

She leaves. Just up and leaves. No explanation, no goodbyes, not so much as a break-up text.

Oh, Grey's, how I hate you. Right now, you're up there with Heroes.

First -- the word is bisexual. Try it. Say it slowly at first. It gets easier the more you say it. Callie is not gay. Callie is clearly bisexual. She has had, and enjoyed, relationships with men. They were important to her. They should not be invalidated just because she's discovered she has a thing for women too. It's ok. We exist. You can use the word. Bisexual. See? That didn't hurt at all, did it?

Now, try this one: Lesbian. It seems a bit sexier, but that's ok. Lesbian. Erica was a lesbian. Lesbian and bisexual are not the same thing, but we can get along together quite nicely. Unless stupid writers decide to have a Lesbian tell a Bisexual woman that she cannot exist. Then we get angry, take back our toasters and go home.

For a show that fired one of your biggest stars (Oh, hi, Isiah. How you doing?) because of RL slurs about one of your RL gay stars, you're being seriously hypocritical. Oh, we support our gay stars. We just don't want to see two girls getting it on on-screen. But it's okay to routinely show het couples sexing it up in the bathroom or the bedroom or the on-call room or hell, a gurney in the middle of the hall. (Ok. Not yet, but I'm waiting for Mer and Der to just go for it one day. Just wait.) But two women having a relationship, that's too much? You've fucking blown a man to a red mist, but girl-on-girl is too much for you?

Yeah, yeah. Fuck you too. You fired one of your best actresses over this and the rumor has it that Sara R. will be leaving when these season is over. I hope she does, because unless this thing between Christina and Owen takes off, I'll no longer have a reason to tune in.